>Don’t swear
If it doesn't work out because I swear in the interview, it wasn't going to be a good culture fit in the first place. This goes both ways.
"no one in her right mind will penalize you for not being immediately available"
Not deliberately, but depending on how bad they need to fill the hole, they may find someone good enough that they don't bother holding out to see if you're better...
And sometimes, no matter how much you read about interviews, you will suck at it.
Interviews are hard for some people.
> Don’t suck at something you say you’re an expert at
This one. If you say you are expert/advanced at X, we will check for some level of competence. It's amazing how many candidates with CVs claiming 'advanced SQL skills' don't know about the existence of the HAVING clause. An exaggerated CV is a very easy filter.